Lets say we are dead thats bad, obviously, but hey, maybe! (a beat.) LYDIA: Excuse me, are you ghosts? airbnb massachusetts wedding how to become a wedding officiant in las vegas. BEETLEJUICE: Oh, not so fast Mr. Soulbox. April 24, 2023 Quotes by Igor. Id like to meet my fianc, Delia. BARBARA is decorating it to look just like, BARBARA thinks for a moment, during which pause there is the, Michael McEachern McDowell (June 1, 1950 December 27, 1999) was an American novelist and screenwriter described by author Stephen King as "the finest writer of paperback originals in America today". Share the best GIFs now >>> And also, I dont model anymore. Nothin' at all! But first, I think it would be so wonderful if our newest family member would make a toast! Give me just one more BEETLEJUICE: It's showtime! CHARLES: OkayOtho! CHARLES: You think this is what I want? You give mea bonerhere, its a femur. Puppet show!! Lydia, you are so weird. <> BEETLEJUICE: DON'T YOU WANNA SEE DAD SUFFER? We will. OH-OH-OH-OH-OH-OH-OH-OH. Ive learned a lot. The movie is directed by the legend Tim Burton; the film revolves around a recently deceased couple (played DELIA: Life coaching! Now heres the problem. Classic Bait and Switch. f`Tpg"TxBK@>O8/c6"n Prrokie! And its not fair, you know? LYDIA: Then Ill find a way to do it myself. So! LYDIA: Hes the loneliest guy I know. Bernard looks down at his shrimp, WIDER -- All the guests are punched by the shrimp, back. Stupid sheet!, (Ad lib.). Hi there. BEETLEJUICE: Boy, do you know how to pick em or what? Well you got what you wanted, Dad. xt`%oE|/N_u.pxe}>'G+OO,?ZT"^E,p/"_?vI$Ym^nuh ,Tk9:NNm'C;UtiFED9N5q:%,xN5|;l8E?|~Q)^z]T~2%Ny|<1. And the teacher was Wiccan! She needs somebody to help her get past all this. In the world of the dead? And they eat ghosts. ITS ALMOST A GIVEN THAT I WILL ALL SOON BE ALIVE. ANY GHOST CAN DO THAT IN LESS THAN ONE LESSON. Theyre in the room with us. I had it open for a second but the Maitlands slammed it shut. LYDIA: It could be both. Growing up in the late '80s/early '90s, watching Beetlejuice with your friends was pretty much a rite of passage. First time haunting your own genuine haunted house, and youre a natural. New phone, who dis? Guy talk howd you do it? BEETLEJUICE: I KNOW THAT BARBARA! OTHO: Delia? So, I have an idea. Shes always like Get a job! or Why is your hair purple? or I shouldve left, like your father. The point is, Maybe we can help each other out, DON'T YOU WANT A PAL? (draws door.) LYDIA: Just wanna make sure I know who I'm working with. CHARLES: Lydia, Im not going to answer a question like that. I thought I was bringing my mom back! Im not sure youre equipped. OTHO: Yes, (imitating DELIA) Woah! She needs stability. Every dead person gets one, but since youre not actually dead, wanna see a sad puppet show? You see, the living ignore the dead. BEETLEJUICE: Fine! Hey, I get it! Fuck Brigadoon. Maybe, we can help each other! LYDIA: Recently Deceased. (DELIA and CHARLES make out on the table.). AH AH AH AH!). Unless I am paid upfront in cash, and learned that the hard way. Michael McEachern McDowell (June 1, 1950 December 27, 1999) was an American novelist and screenwriter described by author Stephen King as "the finest writer of paperback originals in America today". OKAY? BEETLEJUICE: I wanted to help you guys, its literally all I wanted, but the two of you are helpless. YOU CAN DIE TOGETHER! Ugh, classic Maitlands. Setup: A couple of recently deceased ghosts contract the services of a bio-exorcist in order to remove the obnoxious new owners of their house. Maybe nothing has to change. I dont know get it, but Im a part of it! LYDIA: I cant change anything! I FOUND MY FREQUENCY CRYSTALS SPEAK TO ME, EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, THERE ARE SPIRITUAL GUIDES ABOVE LOOK UP AND SEE 'EM, JUST LISTEN TO THE MELODY THE UNIVERSE SINGS, 'CAUSE EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, THE UNIVERSE IS JUST THE CONTENTS OF TIME, MATTER AND SPACE, LYDIA: NINETY-ONE BILLION LIGHT-YEARS ACROSS AND THE EARTH'S A SMALL PLACE, THE PACIFIC ISLANDS ARE SINKING BUT NEGATIVE THINKING IS HARDLY THE CAUSE, YOU THINK LIFE IS ALL UNICORNS AND RAINBOWS 'CAUSE YOU'RE BORED, LYDIA: AND POSITIVITY IS A LUXURY THAT FEW CAN AFFORD, DELIA: NO NO NO! OTHO: (offstage.) Which does not come easy. DELIA: Why thank you, future step-daughter. We will just have to do this without her. car fills up with water, the screams are cut off. And I like the attic! I was blown away, she said. BUT BEETLEJUICE, IT'S NOT AS IF I'VE LOST MY MIND. When Lydia asks for help, Betelgeuse says that by being married to a mortal, he'll be able to spend as much time in the world of the living as he wants, but it's never made clear why that's something he really wants. Im the perfect person to help you battle your ghost. BEETLEJUICE: Well then you have to learn how to scare them! You are never gonna regret this! Normally, I perform exorcisms por bono, but you made me come to Connecticut. endobj stream My dad never wants me to talk about her. That never happens. Not only is he the only ghost who appears to have strict rules tied to his appearances, he's also the only one that appears to strike fear (or at least concern) in the heart of Juno, the Maitlands' tough-as-nails caseworker. Where are you? And you heard what he said, any ghost can do that possession stuff. Wait, why aren't you dancing? LYDIA: There's one thing that can still stop him. I cancelled the exorcist, and Ive hired someone better. MAITLANDS: BJ IS A GRADUATE OF JUILLIARD! Adam, youre boring. I might have to get a little nasty. We, will come to see that the only thing missing to complete the, On the table in the center of the kitchen is a large cake about, three feet by two. CHARLES: Delia Schlimmer, will you do me the honor of signing a prenuptial agreement and be my second wife? Just a bunch of Howards and then you die. BEETLEJUICE: Im tired of being alone! BEETLEJUICE: Well then, go fuck yourself. BEETLEJUICE: No. JUNO: Anyone whose ever died is in there. LYDIA: Yeah. Eh, it was worth a shot. Its the last day of their entire lives and this is what theyre talking about! NEVER MIND, HE'LL BE YOUR G-U-I-D-E TO THE OTHER SIDE, I'M THE B-TO-THE-DOUBLE-E-T-L-E TO THE J-U-I-C-E, BEETLEJUICE: I understand it's a lot to process, but, THE GOOD NEWS IS YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE DIED IN YOUR OWN HOUSE, THAT MEANS THE TWO OF YOU SHOULD STICK AROUND, A LITTLE ON THE POTTERY BARN AND DRY WHITE WINE SIDE, AS FOR ME, I'VE BEEN SCARING FOR MILLENNIA, I'M THE BIO-EXORCIST GIVING HOUSES ENEMAS, BEETLEJUICE AND ENSEMBLE: PUSH OUT ALL THE BREATHERS, BEETLEJUICE: AND I DO IT FOR THE LOVE OF IT, 'CAUSE THIS GUY HAPPENED TO BE PASSING BY, TO GIVE YOU CONTROL OF YOUR SOUL FOR THE WHOLE "BEING DEAD" THING (AH AH AH AH AH AH AH! BEETLEJUICE: Oh, thank you very much. Delia remodels just about every aspect of the house, and the two of them also risk their lives dealing with ghosts and nearly lose their daughter to Betelgeuse's wedding scheme. Right now, just outside the walls of this house, nestled in the hatch back of my Toyota Prius, is a mysterious object of my own design. ADAM: My whole life flashed before my eyes! CHARLES: Thats because Im trying to Delia, do your job please, life coach her. BEETLEJUICE: That is a sandworm. You brought him to life, just so you could kill him? Did I hear the dinner bell? Mr. Juice, I respect your resistance and your Moxy. It's just like you said, you dont always get it, but youre a part of it. ADAM: And your dad has made some big mistakes with the interior design! So if you wanna save Barbara, then I need you to marry me! That was a disaster. Welcome, welcome, welcome! CHARLES: Wouldnt even know where to start. BEETLEJUICE: Pepperoni, mushrooms and snakes! Thank you for being here. From the top of the house to the bottom. For we do not walk alone., GROWN UPS WANT TO FIX THINGS, WHEN THEY CANT, IT ONLY FILLS THEM WITH SHAME, IS IT BEING GREEDY TO NEED SOMEBODY TO SEE ME AND SAY MY NAME. BEETLEJUICE: Thats where tote bags come from. This is so wrong, your my employee, but also my lover! ADAM: That guy! 10 0 obj BARBARA: We are! BARBARA: WE'LL RATTLE CHAINS AND I DON'T KNOW! In McDowell's original script, limbo was more of an empty void than an expansive desert. And we should tell her that! But hey. BEETLEJUICE: Why do you gotta be so hard on me, Mom? <> Where are you going? BEETLEJUICE: Nothing, so your dad wants to suck me into this fancy box. Keep it coming gentleman! Wait! But I swear to you, we will. It has u but doesnt have a me. Well actually it was just this really hot apartment in Queens, where the doors locked from the outside. Im his fifth wife! LYDIA: Hey Maybe we can help each other. But, if youre going to live like a ghost, you have to follow the rules. Dont, DONT text me in the middle of the night saying U up? because guess what? I mean, not this, I dont think anyone could have predicted this. 5 0 obj MISS ARGENTINA: Oh, but you have to go back now. ADAM: I know, I know, me too. ADAM: So, crazy story. OTHO: Delia! I never said-, LYDIA: You never say ANYTHING! CHARLES: Lydia, this is a good thing. I have some good news. Hey guys? MAXINE: OH STOP! DELIA: Dont worry Otho, well put you in the Soulbox! I realized that I dont want to go through life alone. See that tiny little house up there? ONE DAY YOU MAY WAKE UP ALONE, DELIA: 'CAUSE YOUR HUSBAND AND HIS BOYFRIEND BOUGHT A BOAT AND THEN THEY SAILED AWAY TO ROME, DELIA: SO YOU CRY YOURSELF TO SLEEP IN DEEP DESPAIR, TALKIN' TO THE WALLS 'CAUSE THERE'S NO ONE THERE, 'CAUSE THAT'S YOUR LAST CHANCE TO HAVE A FAMILY, THAT YOUR AGING ASS WILL HAVE TO BELIEVE THAT , A LITTLE "I AM STILL YOUNG!!!" But the two of you can. ADAM: I dont mean her, I mean her family. BEETLEJUICE: Whered I lose you? And Im not gonna let you take it from her! Delia! BEETLEJUICE: Back off, Mom! Originality. CHARLES: I just have to get the chalk. A look of sheer delight comes across Lydia's face, NOTE: Delia and the guests are fully aware of their, Lydia excitedly looks around the room to see if she can, Now the song pauses Everyone tries to recover for a, As the tempo quickens, the guest/chorus is syncopated, crashes to its end. You know? If I had known. Also, no liquids! CHARLES: Hey! Either way, Betelgeuse isn't going to be happy about it, and clearly he'll try every trick in his book to get out of serving his time, even if it doesn't work out for him. Now you remember what my guru Otho says! I have a chance to see her again, please! Lets find out! LYDIA: I dont wanna forget about her. Youre all going to die. "3^@fB9Lty/"?p,j"I|)b[pGT\["eVSRsY!,l^"d[\M *p7pj@nekM=?jx 4%mBDb1E%^(i^'p&,D4m+33+}8{)NZa/rv=/v=pca6>]Eol(LlKZF)mm>1t2opP p ?`BX`F^Dd K}9?}< Call 9-1-1! 1 0 obj (Charles and Delia try a Hi-five) Oh, so close! As your guru Otho always said, this is taking too long! Got any references? If this house is haunted, then that means mom might still be back at our old house! DELIA: What are you talking about?
Crater Festival 1978 Lineup,
Is Michael Oher Still Close To The Tuohy Family,
University Medical Center Er Wait Time,
Articles B
